Dinoshark - 2010 - Prehistoc shark flick! DUH!

Here me rambling about this creature feature below.

The Hand - 1981 - Underestimated Oliver Stone flick!

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It's a Alive (trilogy) - 1974-1978-1987 - Monster babies are born, they kill!

This is actually my first attempt at video blogging, or vlogging as I've learned is the term for it. Anyway, this is the fist attempt. Hopefully there will be more and better entries.

House of Purgatory – 2016 – extreme haunted house

I’m a bit surprised that I haven’t seen a flick like this before. It’s been some years since I first heard about the McKamey Manor, a horror place so extreme that you have to sign a waiver to even be accepted to enter. It’s a place so extreme it’s said that no one ever finished it. Everything is allowed, except causing permanent injuries. At least major injuries I would think. But I really don’t know since I haven’t read the waiver…

As I see it, this trend of extreme haunted houses is the basis of this movie. Because I believe that it is a trend. If one starts such an extreme attraction other are sure to follow – and to explore the boundaries even further. The concept here is the argument if there’s really such a place, a place so horrible that no one ever finished it, or if it’s actually an urban legend. The two debaters hit the road to find or not to find the rumored place. Of course they find it!

If they choose to enter, and finish the attraction, they will get the admission fee back. However, since its Halloween, there is no fee… seems kind of strange. Anyway, the gang of four is told that the rumor is in fact false. The goal is not to enter the house and reach the top to get rewarded. They will actually start at the top and move themselves downwards. Four or five levels down. That’s a major basement don’t you think?

Soon they’re exposed to some vanilla scares which, to be honest, gets worst after a while. It starts to get to a couple of them. Typically the women, I guess we cannot escape the non-equality of the sexes. But I feel that women generally are better screamers anyway so… Come to think of it. I was expecting pretty poor acting in this production but I was nicely surprised to see that they are quite good! I believe in the emotions they’re showing on screen. Very nice!

As they descend down the levels there’s a question if this is actually a supernatural house or not. Are they really going down to hell or is the house so perfectly set up that it’ll only seem that way? Well, I believe we get the answer to that later on.

My personal thought about this is that it’s quite a nice horror flick. I like it! I liked the first half better than the last but it’s still way better than I expected. It doesn’t seem to really connect every piece of the puzzle along the way and I wished for a more complex ending, but you can’t have everything. It’s not a very long movie. About 75 minutes and I guess that’s fine. We don’t really need a longer story to get the point made. No one escapes purgatory!

6/10

Tommy Snöberg Söderberg

Silent Retreat – 2016 – A new cool flick!

When I was asked if I wanted to review this movie I was actually very indecisive about it. I haven’t written a review in a long time and I thought I might have a hard time with it. But then I watched the trailer and knew I had to write about it. I also realized that the movies director was Ace Jordan which directed a short I wrote about some years ago. I knew that this would be more than the average amateurish flick that so often seek reviewers. I don’t say there’s anything wrong with that. I really like low budget movies and I often find them very refreshing. But it’s not a contradiction that a low budget movie must be amateurish by default and this movie proves it!

It might come short to the best of the bunch when it comes to acting and directing but the story is solid written and I just lover the persona gallery. There’s some characters that are so out there and I just love them. Ace also manages to deliver characters that really annoys me. That’s is at least as important as characters you love and can relate to. It creates some tension in the group of people the movie is about. There are some elements of a true slasher here. The persona gallery certainly hints about it. We have the bitch, the comedian, the natural leader and the girl next door. But it’s more than a plain slasher. It’s also a movie about team building and mental illness. It is also a ghost story of sorts.

Actually it’s hard to pinpoint what the core genre of this movie is. There is an old asylum somewhere in the background of the story. And that is of course accompanied by a raving lunatic. We get to see flashbacks of, should we say, questionable treatment once used in mental institutions. Methods that could never be used today. Or perhaps there are still places where the physicians lobotomize their patient. I hope not but I wouldn’t really be surprised. I hope the brain split isn’t carried out through the tear channel though. There is such a scene early on. Pay attention, this is actually how they used to preform it. There was also a quite high death rate among the patents.

We get to follow a boy in the past tense story and we get to follow a group of teambuilding youngsters in the present day story. Somehow these are combined and there’s also a raving lunatic running around. It’s not the slasher the persona gallery implies. I already admitted to that. But there are violent deaths involved in the story and you can see some of it in the trailer that I attached to this post. I like the movie a lot but still it seems like it’s lacking some nerve. And at the end of the day this needs to be taken into consideration when rating the flick. Verdict below.

6/10

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The Perfect Husband – 2014 – Witty and disturbing!

What goes on in a deranged mind? I don’t know and I guess that no one without a deranged mind would either. Having that said I just declared myself sane, which might or might not be a lie… In either case, we get to follow a couple with a broken background when they try to find peace with each other and themselves during a country trip.

It’s obvious that neither of them feels very well. The reason is obvious if you keep your eyes open. And even if you don’t you’ll get the message later on. They have lost a child, a new born child. We get glimpses of a birth and a stillborn child. Nothing can be more horrifying in this world than to give birth to a non-breathing baby. This couple quickly gets my deepest sympathy.

It’s kind of a low paced story, almost too low paced at times but it does get really bloody and violent as it goes along. It’s really terrifying what a broken couple might do to each other in the moment of their worst anxiety. We aren’t spared any of it either. There’s a lot of violence that almost makes me want to turn my head away. That’s very unusual but there are a couple of things I feel very uncomfortable seeing. I can’t stand mutilation of hands and eyes for example.

It’s also pretty well acted which is a great asset when it comes to suspense. It’s a pretty exciting movie actually. It’s terrifying and suspenseful at the same time. It’s rather unusual I think, that a film as bloody as this one also manages to keep the audience in such suspense. As I watch it I’m curious on what s going to happen, and who is going to snap first. I mean really go over the edge. It’s obvious that it is going to happen, just not when. And I’m not disappointed at the final breakdown, I can tell you that. There might be one or two twists too many in the story but that’s not such a big deal. This is a great movie, no doubt about it!

8/10

Creeper – 2014 – a dualism, a contradiction, an oxymoron, a paradox

It was a few day since I watched this now. Some movies need that extra time to sink in before thought can be formed into words. I wasn’t sure what to think to begin with. There are parts that are really really gruesome and I wish they had been explored further. This could have been one of the most horrifying experiences all year, but it wasn’t. That doesn’t mean that it’s not good, because it is! It’s just not all horror, which I’d hoped for. There are also some in depth character visualization. We get to see what the main character (the killer) sees from time to time. It’s obvious that he doesn’t view reality in the same way as a “normal” person does. That’s good I think.

I was a bit disappointed with the movies length. It's about 54 minutes long and that means you are not given enough time with the story to really let it get to you. Once the bottom line starts to unravel it just… ends.

The acting in kind of uneven I think. Sometimes it’s just glorious and in the next scene it’s horrible. So my feelings about this are eclectic to say the least. Some parts are really very good and nicely made, whilst some parts are plain boring and badly acted/directed.

What about the main story? Well, it’s about this bloke who kidnaps young girls, keeps them in his cellar and tortures them. Its’ very painful torture by the looks of it too. There are saws and pliers involved, that’s all I can say. The only setback is that we don’t get to see that much. I guess the films budget stopped the development of special makeup effects. If it had the effects of a master or at least dared to show off a little it’d be beautiful.

I guess the story is inspired by real serial killers. I don’t know exactly who the most famous ones pop up in my head. It seems that this killer is based on the likes of Ted Bundy (his charm) and on others that are more gruesome in their killing methods. I like the character created here. It’s kind of a dualism, a contradiction, an oxymoron, a paradox.

The bottom line then? Well, as stated above I find it a bit uneven. It's still very watchable though, despite its short length.

7/10

Trailer: Danish flick ESCAPING THE DEAD

Look quick for Look fast for Tromas Lloyd Kaufman!

Escaping the Dead" is inspired by a series of articles about the deathdrug "Krokodil" that was published about the same period of time when Ronald Poppo had his face eaten by a naked man hooked on bathsalt in Miami. It is the perfect zombie plot: a deathdrug that turns people into zombies.

The film has its starting point in a typical day for the lead character, David. David is the local marihuana pusher, but he is the kind of dealer that smokes more than he sells. In themeantime the country has been hit by a new deathdrug and when David and his partner in crime Ahmir is offered some exceptionally cheap cocaine they see it as an opportunity to earn big money at the big techno concert the following Friday, but the cocaine turns out to have a terrible side effect that creates a giant zombie outbreak that spreads acrossthe entire Copenhagen. In the film we follow David and his bloody fight out of the city.

Directed by Martin Sonntag and Bastian Brinch Pedersen, the film stars Bastian Brinch Pedersen (who is also the co-director and producer of the film) as David, Rama Øzel as Ahmir, along with Dorte Rømer ("Breaking the Waves") and Kim Sønderholm ("Cannibal Fog", "Run", "House of Many Sorrows") playing Lars the policeman. Recently Lone Fleming, legendary horror actress from the "Blind Dead" series and Danish origin joined the cast to play Davids mother. 

IMDb link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3334746/

Le Fear II: Le Sequel – 2014 – not an usually obscure horror flick

Normally when I claim that a film doesn’t suit everyone it’s usually an obscure horror flick or extreme low budget. This is not the case here. I don’t know for sure about the budget and I don’t think it’s a lot but it’s not a shoestring budget either. The acting is quite good and it’s a very funny comedy in my book. It’s about a director trying to get a horror movie done. The obstacles he has to surpass is very odd ones to say the least. He tries very hard to make a great movie but everyone else in the production seems to be total amateurs when it comes to filmmaking. There’s not much going his way.

He’s on the verge on frustration most of the time and it’s actually very entertaining to take part of his anguish (I know, I’m a terrible person). There’s really not much more to tell. The detailed information that I could write down would spoil the experience for you I think. It’s a very thought through production even if it’s an indiefilm. Perhaps it’s just because it’s indie? I often find that indies and low budget movies are more inventive that major Hollywood blockbusters. They’re certainly more creative. But that’s basically the same thing isn’t it?

I wouldn’t say it’s a masterpiece but nowadays few movies seem to be. I think I’ve seen too much in the last couple of years to really appreciate the finer things. I only watch really great movies a couple of times a year. Of course I always keep my hopes up. This one was different enough to be worth the watch.

6/10

Berenice – 2014 – Based on a story by Edgar Allen Poe

This is a story that originates from Edgar Allen Poe. As such I had high hopes for it but it turned out to be somewhat of a disappointment. The story itself is gruesome enough but I find the acting lacking a bit against the usual standards in Jeremiah Kipps films. It’s interesting that it revolves around mental illness I some sort though. I love movies like that. However I think this suffers a bit too much from being too short. As this is the third Jeremiah Kipp short I’ve written about in a short while I see a pattern. I want them longer, but still as intense as they are now. I don’t know if that’s even possible but I can dream can’t I?

This short is included in an anthology that’s out on the market right now. I haven’t seen the other segments but you might want to check it out. It’s called Creepers, a fitting name don’t you think?

7/10

http://www.creepersfilm.com/

Painkiller – 2014 – a truly gruesome little piece!

It’s not often movies really give me the creeps but this one do! The story revolves around two scientists that try to create the ultimate painkiller. It’s an organic organism really and it’s inserted into the test subject’s body. It attaches itself on the spinal core with the idea to absorb all pain the person feels. Sounds good if not even great in theory doesn’t it? Well of course it goes wrong and the organism integrates with the person and requires pain to continue living. And if this painkiller doesn’t receive enough pain the person dies ultimately.

It’s truly gruesome piece which indeed shocks me. I can’t take it when people gets inflicted with more and more pain and actually enjoys it. When it’s, in fact, is imperative for their very existence.

Just as TheMinions, also directed by JeremiahKipp, I wish this was a feature film. It would have been interesting to see how it would hold up over a bit longer time than just 15 minutes. I’m not if I could take it! It’s not that it’s a very gory film and that might be the strength about it. Less is so often more. That doesn’t mean it’s totally without gory effects either. If you’re into August Underground Mordum you might be disappointed but if you’re just after the discomfort this film brings you, it should hit the spot!

8/10

Found – 2012 – Bloody and violent!

This is a fairly violent and bloody movie, but it’s not a horror movie in essence. That’s my opinion anyway and I’ll tell you why. There’s a serious message to be told here and it’s done by letting us watching youngsters watching horror moves. Very violent horror movies I might add.

The essence in my book is about exclusion though. We have this kid, Marty, that gets bullied in school that finally fights back and is made the bad guys for it. Ok, I don’t agree with violence but there is only so much you can take. The bottom line is that you shouldn’t have to apologize for standing up for your rights. Kids might be kids but that’s no excuse for picking on other kids. And besides, Marty wouldn’t get into the fight if it weren’t for his older brother, Steve. It was him who encouraged Marty to strike the other kid if being bullied.

The older brother is an interesting case too. I don’t know what his mental status is but he sure has issues. He seems to hate people and his mom and dad in particular. At times he seems to have a split personality and he likes to chop people’s heads off. He keeps them in a bag in his closet. Marty has found that bag of course and as he looks up to his brother he’s fascinated by it. He dreams about what it must be like to chop of another person’s head.

This brings us to the video violence part. Both Marty and Steve are into bloody and violent flicks. Steve is maybe ten years older and has a collection of violent horror flicks. He lets Marty borrow them from time to time. Marty is especially fascinated by one called Headless, which features a killer in a skull mask. He chops off women’s heads and then has sex with them. The heads that is! It’s totally macabre!

You can imagine the mess Marty’s in. His brother seems to be a psyched killer, he’s bullied at school and he’s starting to fight back towards them who hurt him. He’s starting to stand up for himself. The horror flicks certainly doesn’t help, even though he loves them. He’s all alone. He had one friend but after he leaves him too he has no one – except for a protective big brother!

The script is very complex and it’s hard to describe the film. I like the small and tiny development that drives the story. I think the actors are very good except for a few times when their lines aren’t very convincing. But considering the budget was $8000 I guess you can’t have it all.

I guess the bottom line is about bullied children but the mental status and/or illness of the older brother is in focus too. I like flicks that focus on both things and thus this is a great flick in my book. One of the best I’ve seen recently actually.

8/10

Die Die Delta Pi – 2013 – full frontal nudity!

I think most of us, those of us that like slasher flicks, have seen this story before. It’s really nothing new. I won’t spoil it for you but it involves an accidental death in the past and revenge in present day. It also obviously revolves around a sorority and the girls there. These are exploited of course. Early on there’s full frontal nudity and there’s a few scenes with naked breasts although the movie. This is a cliché approach of course, but it still works in the context of it all.

As most slasher flicks there are really bad acting. Most of it actually but it’s the same thing here. The bad acting serves as funny cliché references. It’s obvious that the movie makers know what they’re doing as they take advantage of it for humorous relief. Often the point of these flicks is not to scare and frighten but to amuse, and this movies does that. Bad acting, stupid dialog but really good makeup effects makes the film worthwhile.

5/10

The Lashman – 2014 – Modern retro slasher

Once you’ve seen a slasher from the golden era you can never get satisfied with a modern one, until now. This one follows the classic layout, a few teenagers in the woods, telling a ghost story by the camp fire (which later comes to life). There is some nudity in it but not too much, just like it was back in the day. It’s just enough to make it interesting but not enough to make it too sleazy or pornographic. If you’re looking for that, keep looking. We’ve got the fat nerd, “crazy Ralph” and youngsters looking to score with the girls. Yes, we’ve seen it before!

The acting is surprisingly good! I was really taken by surprise by the quality of the actors. I started out thinking it was just another independent flick with mediocre acting – at best! This was way better in that sense. The characters may not be deep but there is some tension between them and that’s all you really need.

The movie as a whole is a bit slow to get to the action I think. We almost gets bored with it during the “talky” first half of it. We get a teaser in the beginning and we realize the there are going to be more murders in the film. And about an hour later, or slightly less, the killing spree begins. The Lashman turns up killing them one by one…

I kind of like it even though it is cliché and that we’ve seen it all before. It was a long time ago that I saw a modern slasher this retro!

6/10

Midsummer Nightmares 2: Summers End – 2014 – There’s a lot of cleavage!

Director: Ryan Stacy

Horror

I write this without the benefit of having watched the first one. The reason for this is that I want to treat this as an individual movie rather than a sequel. This might also be the cause for why I don’t totally get it. It seems to me that there’s way to much talk about stuff I don’t really connect to the movies main plot. Correction: of course it’s connected to the main plot, just not in a way that makes a lot on sense.

I can’t really say that it works as slasher. It’s not suspenseful enough, it’s not bloody enough. As a thriller? Well, there’s that thing about suspense again. A thriller more than anything revolves around suspense. The actors are quite bad most of the time but the thing the flick lack is suspense sounds and music. These things can do wondrous things with a mediocre plot.

To be honest, I don’t get this plot. There’s way to much talk about what happened before that’s unknown if you haven’t watched the first movie. I will watch it later though and see if I can connect the dots. The things I get are that some crazy killer from the past returns to kill off a bunch of friends. I don’t know why, there isn’t much motivation to anything in the movie. Why, why, why? That’s always the thing we should get to know one way or another. Except if you’re David Lynch, then you can get away with a totally confusing movie.

It’s hard to separate the acting from the direction. Who’s really to blame? I can’t say for sure but there is at least one saving grace – Christy Faulkner, who does the part of this hot ginger head Amber. She’s by far the most skilled actor in this production. That’s my opinion anyway! Many of the others, not all of them of course, seem to be in the production just to add cleavage values! That’s not necessarily a bad thing saying so makes me feel like a dirty old man. But perhaps that’s just what I am. The thing is that there’s a lot of cleavage but not enough boobs for it to be really sleazy. The attempt is fine to begin with but it does not work all the way.

All in all this is a little to amateurish for me to get off on. It’s a pretty short movie, about 70 minutes – luckily! It feels much longer than that since the pacing is so slow. Why don’t the killer come out and kill some of the characters already. There’s a decent teaser in the beginning of the film, but then there’s all that cleavage… In the end there’s an obvious attempt to surprise us which only add to the confusion. Just make it simple next time!

But did I regret seeing this? Do I want my time back? Not really. It was still worth my time and it should be worth your time too. It may not be top notch but very few movies are and there are after all some intriguing things about it. Did I mention Christy Faulkner?

4/10

Ps. having watched the first instalment of this I can now say I get it! At least I get it more than I did before. My views above haven’t changed, it’s still a confusing movie but if you have seen the first film you much better off. It would facilitate your understanding for this! Ds.